Not everyone has dramatic season like Michigan does. Yes there are other states out there that has it but not all states do. We have seasons that include: leaves changing colors, rains both warm and cold, snow (was going to say white but lets be honest it isn’t always white), green grass, flowers, lawn mowing, snow blowing, school, no school and each season has it own beauty and its own downfalls.
Now my life is entering a new season. I have been in this season before but not like this. This is the season of no children at home and all are in school, all day, every day.
I was here twice before. Kyle got to school and Adam wasn’t around yet but it wasn’t long and I had Adam. Then Adam was in school. Still it didn’t feel like those days were over.
I had always felt like I would be the mother to four children. Even though my current husband at that time didn’t want more, I felt like more were coming.
Tomorrow though, tomorrow is different. I should be doing a happy dance. I should be cool, calm and collected and excited about what comes next on my journey. My middle son is a senior in high school and my baby son is going into developmental kindergarten. That isn’t how I feel though. Tomorrow is truly a new season in my life and I have no idea how to deal with it.
I should be thinking about what I could do with my time. Like napping like a kitten or exercising, or organizing or being able to focus on our at home companies or even volunteering at the kiddos schools. Instead I feel as if I was going 100 MPH on the expressway and my tire blew out from under me and I am just in shock.
I stood at the open house to meet the teacher for Jack David and about lost it. I didn’t even go to Bella’s because, well I am an emotional basket case currently. And Adam’s, well he is a senior. Where has the time gone?
This time will be different when I put them on the bus. I have had my four babies. I have had the change to be an at home mom with most of them. I have at some point been an at home mom with all of them. Now they are all gone during the school year. Now they are growing and going out on their own and become little people.
There are no more babies coming and I am entering a new season in life and I have no idea how to handle any of it. Well other than tomorrow and probably most of this week I will be using a lot of pick-me-up oil.
Guess it is time to dig in my heals, get with God, open my Bible, be with Him and trust He will lead me where I need to be going. It is just hard because for 23 years I have been a mom and that is what I have gotten good at. That is who I am known as. It is hard to think I am going to move past that, starting tomorrow….
Have you hit this season in your life yet? How did you deal with going from being a full time mom to this?
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